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I am a cheapskate. In all things really, but especially when it comes to on-demand services us elder millennials just didn’t grow up with.
I’ve never downloaded DoorDash to shuttle a burrito to my front door, or used Rover to outsource my dog walking.
Look, I would love to cloak this thriftiness in a worried concern for gig economy workers, but really it’s just Midwestern frugality. I will trade my time to save money running the six blocks down the street to scoop my own takeout, or take Ralph to the park between work calls.
All that to say, when I spotted this new trend on social media of women pointing out the disparity between male Instacart shoppers and female Instacart shoppers, it was news to me.
@maaaddsssssss anyone need some ginger?? #ginger #instacart #grocerydelivery #gingershots #immunityshots #gingerroot ♬ original sound – madi
@gilliannryan interesting choices, steve! 👍 #fyp #instacart #instacartshopper #nyc ♬ use if your fine – moxieaep
They can’t spot items in front of their face, or need turn-by-turn directions to get to the right aisle.
Meaning, instead of paying for the luxury of not having to shop for themselves, these women find themselves paying and doing the shopping anyway…just by text instead of IRL.
Even men are in on the trend:
@harlandisntreal I’LL ACTUALLY GET THE RIGHT ORDER YAYYYYY #instacart #instacartshopper #maleinstacartshoppers #weaponizedincompentence #groceries #groceryhaul #fyp ♬ original sound – Jo Wuensche
It reminded me of the classic bit in The Office where Ryan argues that Pam is “so much better” at cleaning the microwave than he is, and that’s why he left it a mess.
The comments go deep on this, and inevitably lead to women bringing the topic closer to home.
Namely, the unpaid male Instacart shoppers in their lives that are these women’s boyfriends and husbands.
It bums me out because learned helplessness, or its meaner cousin, weaponized incompetence, is not an attractive trait in men.
“He can’t find the ice cream I buy every week and told me ‘They must not carry it here’ at the grocery store I’ve been buying it at for the past three years.”
“It’s like he needs Waze to locate the organic spinach.”
No deeper meaning to this, just to say: Don’t be a bad Instacart shopper in your own life.
Don’t be Ryan from The Office (for plenty of reasons, not just the microwave fight).
And when you notice yourself defending yourself with learned helplessness, or have it pointed out to you by an exasperated loved one, take the cue as a lesson, not as a reason to go on the defense.
More relationship resources from SG HQ:
Why “Magic Making” in your Relationship Matters
The Best Relationship Advice I Ever Got Came From Scientology
Is She Into You, or Just Leaning In? How to Interpret Women’s Body Language
